Dear Wauwatosa Presbyterian and Pres House,
Two months ago to this day you commissioned and sent me off
on a journey to Zambia. Since then each day has been full—full of new people
who morphed into family and friends; full of eye-opening, earth-shattering
realities about poverty and the systems of the world; full of nshima—Zambian
food; full of harmonious song, full of handshakes; full of children laughing;
full of people shouting at me saying, “Muzungu” or white person; full of
marriage proposals; full of loneliness; full of togetherness; full of
cockroaches; full of thoughts of how much water I use, full of students wanting
to learn so badly; full of many students performing poorly in classes; full of
the language; Nyanja, and me not knowing what in the world is going on; full of
not knowing exactly what will happen next and being led from place to place;
full of dust; full of heat; full of power outages; full of prayer, even with
demons; full of markets; full of sweeping and dishes; full of lesson plans;
full of not knowing if the kids are actually learning anything; full of
dancing; full of effort; just plain full.
Two months have passed and just when I think I’ve been
filled to the brim, the people around me find more room to fill me up. I am
thankful to them, and especially you at home who are making this experience
possible. Thank you for your prayers and support. I want you to know that I am
in the thick of life here in Zambia and it is both lovely and challenging. Most
of the time I feel a million things at once, but I do know I am transforming
for the better. I am grasping a better understanding of God’s beautiful,
mysterious, living reality. This understanding is one I knew before, but not in
a profound way that sunk in or caused me to act enough. So let my new
perspective be a reminder and inspiration to you.
The life each of us live as individuals is not reality. I
think we should use “reality” as much broader term to encompass all of humanity.
There is a valid and actual diversity in this world, people living in different
ways, with different values, under a different system of oppression or even
privilege—and all of this is real. This is reality. Reality is not just how you
choose to live your life, or what choices you have, or how you read the Bible.
Your life doesn’t totally grasp reality because others live life differently,
with different choices available, and their lives are just a real—and just as
beautiful and just as challenging. Realizing this phenomenon of broad and
diverse human reality allows us transcend. If we look at reality as beyond our
own experience, we can go halfway across the world, changing our individual
life and pick up someone else’s, at least in a small way for a while. If we
don’t accept our individual perspective as reality, we can look around us and
say, this life I am living, with poverty near or far, is not God’s kingdom.
This world with its systems of oppression is not what God planned. When we
realize that our own lives are not reality in its completeness, we can change
what we see around us!
So don’t stop looking around, Pres House and Tosa Pres! Look
at yourselves and see where your life doesn’t match the realities of others and
where it doesn’t match the reality God wants for us. If you don’t know quite
how to do this, I’m right there with you, but if my time in Zambia is teaching
me anything it is that attempting to live into God’s greater reality takes time
and starts with merely showing up, over and over again, in the lives of people.
Just showing up. Honestly, that’s about all I can muster everyday, but it seems
to be working and I am very blessed.
Apologies for the sermonizing, but I am truly thankful for
your support and it means so much to know I have such an amazing church family
filling me up and sending that love halfway around the world. My cup overflows!
In gratitude, Hannah
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